I don't think
by ilfreitas
Summary: Remus decides to give up on thinking. And does that just a liitle to much. Something has to be done! Especially since he gets a but annoying...  SiriusxRemus two-shot
1. I don't think

**Disclaimer:**** Remus married Tonks in the books. So obviously the books are not mine.**

AN: VOTE ON MY GAME _Pairings You Never Thought Of_ Oh, and on my poll! :D

**I Don't Think**

"…so I think we should go through the third floor if we want to avoid Filch." James said as he climbed in through the Fat Lady's portrait into the common room "But I don't know, what do you think, Moony?"

"I don't think." Remus simply stated.

"Really? Padfoot also didn't like the idea, he says it's much funnier if Filch tries to chase us, but I never thought you would think that's a good idea."

"I told you, James, I don't think." Remus sat on the couch next to Peter, who was playing chess with Sirius.

"Hey, Moony!" Sirius grinned while James looked confused at the werewolf.

"Remus! Want to play chess with me after Sirius loses?" Peter asked smiling.

"Hey!" Sirius complained.

"Sorry, Wormtail, but I can't." Remus took a book out of his bag.

"Why?" disappointment was on the rat's face.

"Chess is a mental game. And I don't think."

"What do you mean, you don't think?" James finally asked.

"I simply don't. I gave up on thinking." Moony opened the book.

"But…but you're Remus! You're our thinker!" Sirius looked scandalized "If you don't think, then who will?"

"I don't know, I can't think of a name for you because I don't think."

"But _why_?"

"Thinking is no good. Only leads to bad things, so I decided not to do it anymore." And he ended the conversation by burying his head on the book.

"…" the three stared at him.

"I don't get it…" Sirius frowned "it's like he finally listened to us."

"Except that he took it to the extreme."

"Just because I don't think, that doesn't mean you can talk about me like I'm not here." Remus flipped a page.

"Then why are you reading?"

"I'm not sure I get that." Remus raised his head.

"If you don't think, you can't read!" James pointed out.

"Then by the same standards I also can't talk, walk, eat…"

"So you have to think." Sirius concluded smugly.

"Well, it's not like I'm studying or something."

"You're not?"

"There are other books, you know? For people who read for pleasure? Novels?"

"Those things exist?" Sirius asked terrified "Why? Why would- I don't- Its- …What's the point?"

"Entertainment." Remus tried not to smile.

"…Prongs? Tell me that isn't true. It's a myth, right? Like that old guy who gives presents or that fairy who buys teeth from kids."

Remus let a laugh.

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"Lupin, I need a word with you."

The other three Marauders shared incredulous looks as Remus packed his books and walked to McGonagall.

"Alone." She glared at them.

"Whatever you want, Minnie, dear." Sirius purred.

The boys smiled too sweetly and left the classroom with the door open, only to return again under the Invisibility Cloak.

"Is there a problem, Professor McGonagall?" Remus asked.

"I want to know the meaning of this." She showed him a piece of parchment. "This isn't your essay, now is it?"

"It has my name on it, doesn't it?" Remus replied with a blank look.

"But you didn't do it."

"I did."

"Lupin, yours are usually the best essays I have, always with top grades. This one was copied by word from the manual and it barely has the minimum length. Did something happen? Didn't you have time because of the full moon?" she asked with a hint of concern "Do you want another chance to write it?"

"I just…don't think. So I can't study or write my opinion, because that doesn't exist without thinking."

"Are you alright? Do you want to see Madam Pomfrey?" she looked at him as if she doubted his sanity. "Is this because of what we discussed on the other day?"

"Thank you for your concern, but there's nothing to worry about." he paused and blushed a little before adding "This actually helps about what we discussed."

"Not thinking? I doubt." She sighed "Well, I'm disappointed to have to say your grade is going to drop with this essay. A shame, really."

"It doesn't upset me if I don't think about it." He smiled.

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"Okay, this has gone too far," Sirius growled "He got a T on a Transfiguration essay, detention at other three classes and points were deducted at History of Magic. _History of Magic!_ How can someone lose points on that class? And it's not only about school, Moony barely talks to us anymore and when he's not eating he's staring into space, _not thinking_.This has to stop."

"We should find out what started the whole thing." James agreed.

"McGonagall knows." Peter added "She talked about something with Remus, remember?"

"But it's not like she's going to tell us…"

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"Minnie meow meow, my sweetheart!" Sirius grabbed McGonagall's hand. "What a pleasure is to see you here!" he tried to kiss her hand but she took it out of his reach before he could.

"We're at the door of my office, Black. Where did you expect to find me?"

"Why, here, of course!" he beamed "But I always get so excited to see you…!"

"What do you want?"

"Blunt, I like it." Sirius smirked "Well, if you insist, there's nothing I can deny to you…"

"Black…"

"I've been wondering if you know what's going on with my dear friend Remus? Perhaps you heard of him? Before you can answer, there's no need to get jealous, my love for you surpass any other-"

"All I know is that he's letting his studies down. Your fault, I presume."

"Minnie!"

"If that was all, I'm going back inside. Good day, Black."

"Can I come too?" he asked eagerly.

She closed the door on his smiling face.

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Sirius looked at Remus, who just lay asleep on his bed.

He was starting to think of what was annoying him so much about Remus and at the same time admire his hair in the moonlight when Remus moaned.

"M-Moony?"

Remus turned on the bed and arched his backs.

And moaned again.

"Aah…"

"R-Remus." Sirius whispered with his voice shaking. He was starting to feel his pants too tight.

"Sirius!" Remus sat on the bed, panting. "Wha-what are you doing awake?"

"I…I heard you…Are you alright?" Sirius sat on the werewolf's bed, closed the curtains and put a Silent charm on so not to wake his other friends.

"Yeah." Remus looked down.

"What were you dreaming about?"

"Nothing." He answered and Sirius raised an eyebrow "Really. Dreams are what you think about when you sleep, so I wasn't dreaming."

"Bloody hell, stop doing that, Remus!" Sirius snapped. Remus's eyes widened.

"Doing what, Padfoot?" Remus trembled.

"Saying you don't think! Not talking to us, stare at space and failing all your classes! I miss you, Moony."

"I-I can't." Remus closed his eyes.

Sirius got an idea "Hey, Remus, if you don't think then you always say the first thing that comes to you mind, right? So you're absolutely honest!"

"I wouldn't put it like that. I can come up naturally with a lie. Especially if I answer by habit."

"Alright…" Sirius frowned. "But you wouldn't lie to me, would you?"

"Of course not, Padfoot."

"Ah ah! That was a lie, wasn't it?" Sirius pointed a finger at him, slightly hurt "You can't lie to me, Moony! Do you have another secret?"

"I don't have to answer, you know."

"That's a yes. How long?"

"Two ye- stop doing that, Sirius!"

"Only when you stop too."

"I can't stop, Padfoot." He repeated.

"Why, Moony? Why do you lie to me? Why can't you stop not thinking?"

"Because, Sirius! Every time I think, I think about you! I can't think, study, do my homework, take notes in classes, talk to you, James, Peter or anyone else without ending up thinking of you! _'Sirius's hair looks so smooch today, I wonder what would feel like if I touched it?', 'Sirius said such a funny joke at History of Magic, it was really hard to concentrate in class!', 'I wish I could go out with Sirius instead of working on this essay, why didn't he ask me instead of that Hufflepuff bimbo?', 'Stop thinking about him, Remus, he'll never like you in the same way!'_" he took a deep breath "I can't think about _anything_ without leading it to you! And then I can't stop thinking about you and then I think I love you!"

Sirius stared at him in shock.

"Oh bugger." Remus whispered "Well, now you can either ignore what I just said and leave, I can pretend this never happened, don't worry, or…or I could- I could stay away if you're disgusted or something…" he lowered his head.

"Oh Moony," Sirius said, smiling, and lifted his face with both hands so they would look at each other in the eyes "If you had been thinking maybe you would have noticed that I also can only think of you."

Sirius chucked and gave him a small peek on the lips.

"I love you too, you dumb werewolf."

Remus blinked and stared at him with big eyes and his mouth opened.

"You-you put a Silent spell on, didn't you?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"We're going to need it." Remus smirked and jumped at him.

Sirius grinned against his lips and put one arm around his waist.

"Eh, Moony, I like the way you think…"

* * *

**Don't we all?**


	2. Extra: I don't dream

**Disclaimer:**** Remus married Tonks in the books. So obviously the books are not mine.**

AN: VOTE ON MY GAME _Pairings You Never Thought Of_ Oh, and on my poll! :D

**I Don't Dream**

"Hey Moony," Sirius played with the waistband of the werewolf's pants "what were you dreaming about last night?"

"Last night?" Remus looked at the face that shared a pillow with his.

"Yeah, you were dreaming about something. What is it? Can I help…" he added huskily "making it true?"

"Dear Merlin, no!" Remus said shocked "No, never!"

"Too kinky?" he raised his eyebrows several times with a smirk.

"No! Sirius…I …I was a werewolf and was chasing you all! I had already killed Peter!" Remus whispered.

"…You mean….I got turned on by watching you having a nightmare?" Sirius blinked "Oh God…"

"You got turned on?"

"I…you were moaning! What did you expect me to do!" Sirius blushed.

"What's wrong with you? Jerking off on that!"

"Hey, I did not jerk- …James?" Sirius sat up.

"Good mourning, mate, finally noticed you two aren't the only ones in this room?" they heard from the bed next to them.

"But…" Remus sat too "Sirius put a Silent charm on. How can you hear us?"

"Well obviously he was too busy with his Little S to do it properly."

"So you heard? …_Everything?_" Remus blushed.

"Don't ever tell me again I'm not the best friend ever… dear lord, my virgin ears…"

"Oh Merlin…"

"Yeah..." James shuddered "But moving on to another topic, alright? I don't need to recall this night _at all_. So, Remus, killing Pete, hein?"

"By the way, where is he?"

"After that lovely argument you two had last night and those love declarations we thought that everything was fine and then you decide it was the right place and time to …eh, _demonstrate_ your love…" James smirked "Well, we decided we should go sleep on the common room. Damn Wormtail transform himself and ran downstairs before I could reach it and claim the couch his. Oh, and to make sure I wouldn't force him out he locked me in here with you two."

"How nice of him." Sirius grinned wickedly.

"I thought so too. Ah, but, Moony, don't change the subject! I was asking about that killing Peter thing… not that he doesn't deserve it, after what he did to me…"

"Oh. That." Remus shifted uncomfortably in the bed.

If the curtains had been open the two animagus would be staring at him now. But James rather prefer to remain his virgin eyes, uh well, virgins so only Sirius did it.

"You killed Peter in your dream."

"It's not my fault! It was the full moon! You three were all running away from me, but Peter's slower so, hum, I got him…"

"And you ate him? Can't believe Sirius would wank himself watching you doing that…"

"I told you, I did not wank on that! I was merely pleased with Moony's moans, you twat!" Sirius threw a pillow at James.

"Hum, so, uh, yeah, how long will we be locked in here?" Remus asked.

"Until Peter remembers we're still in here, locked."

"That'll take a while."

"Oh yeah."

"…Prongs, you might want to make sure we do the spell right this time and lock yourself in the bathroom or jump through he window, cause me and Moony are going to 'demonstrate our love for each other', alright? You're the best!" Sirius winked, closed the curtains and did the spell again.

James stared at the closed curtains and ran to the window.

"HEY, YOU OUT THERE! YEAH, YOU! HI. I'M JAMES POTTER. OF COURSE YOU KNOW WHO I AM! CAN YOU TELL PETER PETTIGREW THAT HE'S AN ASS AND-"

"Stop yelling, Jimmy! You're ruining the mood!" Sirius opened the curtains and glared at him.

With a 'tsk!' he closed the curtains again.

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**I just wanted to add a part on which Remus explains his dream to Sirius, and then all this came out xD**

** Oh, and I changed the summary **


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